Articles

Articles by Bonnie Miller

Pain Relief is only a Breath Away

Is there help for those suffering with chronic pain? A host of pain medications advertised by drug manufacturers boast long lasting relief in seconds. Over time many chronic pain sufferers using these pain relievers discover stronger or more chemicals are needed to provide relief.What then are they to do?First …do what comes naturally…BREATHE! Of course breathing is natural, but are you breathing during the pain? Many people stop breathing and hold their breath or change their normal breathing pattern when experiencing pain. This sets off a chain reaction in the mind. By holding your breath and tensing your muscles in response to your pain, you are giving your self mixed messages about your pain and how you wish your body to respond to it. By responding to your pain in that way; what are you telling your body? When in pain --- respond with shortness of breath ( thus reducing oxygen intake, tightening muscles, restricting blood flow, increase pain, elevate heart rate, etc…). Not a conducive atmosphere for healing, now is it?Pain is your body’s natural warning system. This system produces whatever is necessary to draw your attention to an imbalance in the body so that it can be restored to balance as quickly as possible. You don’t have to listen to the body’s alarm constantly to address it. Such as the fire alarm blast, a few short blasts and you are aware of the need to respond, but you don’t have to hear it constantly to effectively put the fire out.During the healing process, it is important to feel relaxed and confident. When we are tense and anxious we retard the body’s natural tendency toward perfect health and balance. You can compliment your medical advisor’s pain management program. You can do your part by brining harmony and balance through a positive thought process along with mindful breathing. You already have all the power you need to change your life…breathe and change your mind.

I Got No Time: Holiday Stress

Holidays are upon us and we are racing to the shops, to the grocery, to work, to the mall, to the health club, to parties, to the cleaners and even racing to church. Racing here and racing there, racing - racing everywhere....and wishing for just a little more TIME. Let's see...if I had more time I would:

* visit my mother

* take a long soak in the tub

* get a massage

* take a class

* make Christmas gifts for my family

* bring my friend their favorite dish

* enjoy a nature walk

* spend an enchanted evening with my spouse

do things that nurture my spirit

Take a minute and list those things that you would do for yourself, if you had just a little more time....Finished? You are not going to believe this! Well, here it goes. There is absolutely nothing stopping you from doing those things that you really want to do...you just have to choose...yes choose which things you won't do in order to get those things that you do want. Making your life a priority is not selfishness, it is sanity.When was the last time you said NO and stuck to it when asked to overburden you with a job someone else didn't or wouldn't do? We rationalize our behavior by saying "well, I am healthy and active and I can do it", but at this pace, for how long? Learning to relax and let go of the time clock in our head...and the burdens we allow others to place upon our time takes practice. You can't just shake the door mat once and expect it to be clean. Taking time for you feels uncomfortable at first. You may feel you are betraying others, being selfish, ungrateful, and all those negative feelings that have kept you strung out for this long. So start out small at first and build on those little things you love to do. You want to feel empowered but supportive of others and that takes time when you are accustomed to "no problem, I can handle that or I'll be glad to," etc.Make your list and check it twice. It is totally OK to be nice to yourself. It is totally OK to feel yourself to be worthy. It is totally OK for you to feel at peace with yourself. Make an effort to become your own best friend, be kind and considerate to yourself, and appreciate your talents, gifts and special abilities. You are unique; there is no other person just like you. When joy comes from within, like a mirror, it is reflected to everyone and everything in encounters. Let your life be one of great joy and let it be a refection of you, an inspiration to others because you celebrate your life, not because you can, but because you want to. All you have to do is choose.You already know how to make it right for everyone else...isn't it TIME you make it right for you? Choose this holiday season, to take time to be an instrument of peace and tranquility to yourself and your holidays will be special because you are a part of it!

Consider the Source

You looked tired...didn't get enough sleep? Bad hair day? Barber out of town? Out of ginkgo? You would forget your head if it wasn’t attached! Can't you do anything right? Are you ever going to be on time? You will be late for your own funeral! Why can't you put out just a little effort? Don't you love me enough to do this one thing for me? You cannot finish anything, you are stupid!Ouch! These painful comments and criticisms are all too often the slings and arrows of everyday life. Family, friends and even coworkers are unwittingly bombarding these negative suggestions on our psyche. When you feel the pain, guilt and rejection, brought about by someone else's impression or opinions of your behavior or appearance...STOP! Think on these statements before you react and begin to believe that unsettling assault. What are they gaining by making me feel worthless? What is it about that person that would make them feel better for making me feel bad? How miserable a life this person must have...to find pleasure in creating pain in others? Is the opinion of others one that I truly believe about myself? Changing your perspective of the person will create in you a feeling of understanding and control. No one that feels good about themselves creates pain in another...it just can't happen...If you feel good, you want everyone to feel good. On the other hand when you are feeling down, you are confused and frightening, negativity flourishes. Instead of being the victim of a paralyzing verbal attack, you can look at the attacker with a broader, wiser perspective. It is not your job to make them feel better by becoming hurt or humiliated. Most often they don't even realize, consciously why or how much pain they are inflicting. Not to mention how much pain they are feeling themselves. They are simply reacting to their unrecognized, underlying pain. If you notice how the depleting attacks on you often energize, almost invigorates the attacker, while leaving you feeling like the bottom of a puddle, drained and disoriented. They are drawing from you much needed energy...which fills them with good feelings, power, and strength. I like to call them energy vacuums. When they leave the room everyone in it sighs a sigh of relief. You can actually feel it, physically. How can you make it stop? Armed with this knowledge, you can begin to forgive...several times a day...forgive them...for they know not what they do. They see life through the clouded view of their own misery. Forgive yourself, for doubting yourself. Forgiveness does not condone the person’s actions, but instead sets you free from the prison of misery and misunderstanding that surrounds you both. Smile knowing with this awareness and understanding you increase your energy and are free to create a strong positive environment. With love and understanding they too, will grow and learn to forgive. Forgive them now, and set yourself free!

School is Out for Summer...or is it?

The school of life is never out for summer...we are constantly learning and growing whether we are consciously aware of it or not. Through our senses and experiences we are adjusting and conforming to our environment. As children, we looked forward to summertime, the time we were free...free from the confines and structure of the classroom and liberated to play independently all summer. Creating queens and kings, castles and fortresses, hospitals and war zones and secret hideaways; we took on roles, limited only by our imagination, movie stars, pirates, super hero, mommies and daddies. We often cast ourselves in roles of jobs we would like to do, services we would like to perform, power we would like to have, recognition for excellence, challenges we could overcome. For in our infinite imagination there are no restrictions or limitations! We were all remarkably artistic and used the wondrous palette of our imagination, to create volumes of playful scenarios, to amuse ourselves all summer. These powerful imaginings were and still are a part of who we are today. The creative free spirit of summer is still there; though it may be snuggled way back in the recesses of your subconscious mind...it is still there. It is simply waiting for you to remember to access it once again...to pull out the palette and begin to paint the marvelous summer, you desire. Filled with open windows opportunity and creativity...vast oceans of relaxation...skies billowing with puffy white clouds to peacefully while away the hours creating playful experiences for yourself, in the privacy of your own precious mind. As you begin to allow yourself this simple pleasure of imagining - What that would feel like now? How comfortable does it feels? Like putting on an old flannel shirt, that wonderful comfortable freedom of expression... Wait, what's that? You hear a thud of reality....Work-Responsibility-Time. " I am way too responsible you say" Me? Self indulgent and free spirited? Ignoring my hectic schedule...drawing the curtains back and opening the windows of creativity, it’s not gonna happen!" And thus, you have closed the door once again on the wonderful creative part of you that is still alive... and living inside of you waiting and waiting…Waiting for the opportunity to express itself… Waiting until you will have time to come out and play...so you can experience the freedom and joy of playful imaginings again...when everything you do is creative, magical and spiritual and the scenes unfold perfectly, just as you create them. Stop for just a moment now, and bring yourself back to a simpler time...kite flying days...when cane poles and puppies were under the back porch...when sheets made the best castles...trees were lookouts and perfect for climbing and swinging...marbles and jacks were the games of chance and skill...chasing fireflies at dusk...and there were always wildflowers to pick and cool clover to rest your bare feet in...puffy white clouds formed endless sketches of wonderful figures across beautiful blue skies...right before your eyes, quietly...allowing...contemplating... experiencing...nature all around you. What was your favorite spot to play...your extraordinary images that you enjoyed retreating to in the summer...has it changed since you last visited? Or is it just like you left it...safely tucked away with favorite toys and memories of places and friends, in the storehouse of your mind. Take time this summer to revisit the joy and simplicity of your imagination. Rekindle the friendship you once had with that curious, blissfully creative, childlike quality within you. What wondrous wisdom have you stored away? School is out for summer, but you will never stop learning. Begin today to draw from your infinite resources in your mind, bringing back that awesome, powerful, and creative person, add the wisdom you have gain throughout the years and continue to grow and learn. Hey, you're not finished yet; the best perhaps, is yet to come...Imagine that? Now, go play! Take a nice deep breath and have a great summer!